If you find you keeping having the same, looping conversation, feel as if you’re in ‘two minds’ or are anxious without a discernible cause, this can be because you have a contradiction going on inside you.
Your mind always wants to do what you desire, so cannot cope well with the conflict!
For example, say you are trying to go down a clothes size and you ‘know’ you shouldn’t eat your favourite pizza so often – but one part of you is saying, “I mustn’t have pizza until next week” and another part is retorting, “But I love pizza, and I want some now!”
Equally, one part of you may be saying, “I must go running to get fitter” and another part pops up with, “But I hate running!”
We can also have this happening at an even more subconscious level. For example, say you are introverted by nature but you have to go to a network meeting or social gathering, your thoughts will be divided between, “I really don’t want to go” and, “I must go”; as a result, you can feel unsettled, anxious and maybe tetchy.
Then your mind, which actually just wants to make you happy and anxiety-free, will leap into help mode… and suddenly you’ve eaten that pizza to satisfy your urge, you’ve sprained your ankle so you can’t run, and you’ve developed a nasty sore throat so you can’t make the event.
It is so much easier to act when you can identify what is going in inside.
When you start feeling anxious and before your mind starts ‘helping’, do some ‘square breathing’:
-breathe in for four seconds
-hold for four
-breathe out for four
-hold for four
Repeat 2-4 times.
This process separates the emotions from your thoughts; thank your mind for the signal (the anxiety) and ask what the message or conflict is that it’s trying to tell you about.
The next steps are up to you; you may eat the pizza, go cycling instead of running, or go with a friend to the event – now it’s your conscious choice and the contradiction is gone, you’ll feel better.
Exercise, singing, a good diet, meditation and hypnosis (self-hypnosis or with a therapist) all help with alleviating anxiety, but you start now by talking to your mind. Tell it the truth daily: “I am enough and phenomenal, skilled, and resilient!” and you’ll feel the benefits.[This was my column for the Jersey Evening Post on 08 July 2020.]
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Jacqui Carrel helps people overcome anxiety, fears and phobias. You can download free ‘stop anxiety’ hypno/guided meditations here.
Please note, these can help you up to a point, and you have access to them with my blessing.
However, these are not the same as a full RTT session, which also gets to the root cause of an issue and takes away the unhelpful, deep-rooted beliefs built up around what happened. In the session, we also recode your mind with up-to-date, empowering beliefs.
To find out more, just contact me for a no-obligation chat 🙂